Every Movie, Every Rating
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey: Not a good as it should have been and just a money maker. 3.5 Stars
Red Dawn: Pitiful excuse for an action film, gets its stars purely based on Chris Hemsworth's manliness. 1.5 Stars
Skyfall: Typical Bond film. 3.5 Stars
Dredd: Surprisingly good and simply badass. I am the law! 3.5 Stars
Paranormal Activity 4: I love these movies too much to give it any other rating. 5 stars
Bait: Terrible, terrible film. 0.5 Stars
The Watch: An all star cast couldn't make the weak plot shine. 1.5 Stars
The Expendables 2: 102 minutes of testosterone. 3.5 Stars
Total Recall: No where near as good as the original but still gives it a red hot crack. 3.5 stars
Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter: Poor attempt at what could have been a really exciting film with an original concept. 2 stars
The Amazing Spiderman: Haven't I seen this recently somewhere before? 3 Stars
The Dark Knight Rises: A perfect ending to the fantastic Christopher Nolan Trilogy looking at the dark side of the legend. Top 100 Movies of All Time
Ted: Just like a good episode of Family Guy, inappropriately awesome. 4 Stars
Snow White and the Huntsman: How does Kristen Stewart have a career in acting? 2 Stars
Rock of Ages: Awesome soundtrack, weak story. 2.5 Stars
Prometheus: Not many people liked this film but I loved it! 5 Stars
The Dictator: Better than Bruno, but light years away from Borat. 2.5 Stars
Men in Black 3: Solid effort, better than the second but not as good as the first. 3 Stars
The Avengers: Box office winner for the year, appeals to everyone. I thought it lacked one or two things so I couldn't give it a perfect rating but it was close. 4.75 stars
Battleship: Surprisingly good mainly because Rhianna keeps her mouth shut and the sound is awesome, needs to be watched on a massive screen with awesome surround sound. 4 Stars
Chronicle: Tries to squeeze the last little bit of life out of the found footage genre. 2.5 Stars
Mission Impossible 4: Tom Cruise taking a beating for 2 hours so if you like that kind of thing... 3 Stars
The Hunger Games: Way better than I expected due to it's target audience but I am still unsure whether I am cool with kids killing each other for entertainment. 4 Stars
Girl with the Dragon Tattoo: Great take on the now infamous millennium trilogy with a distinctly Se7en feel. Performance of a lifetime by Rooney Mara. 4.5 Stars
21 Jump Street: Massive surprise. Jonah Hill is at his hilarious best and who thought Channing Tatum could be funny. 4 Stars
John Carter: Box Office Bomb of the year and deservedly so. Just like the date I was on at the time of viewing, dull and boring. 1.5 Stars
Underworld: Awakening: Underworld movies are never good, but hey Kate Beckinsale in leather. 2 Stars
The Devil Inside: One of the worst movies I have ever seen. Exemplified by the fact there was only two of us in the cinema and the old lady sitting infront of me after the movie turned around and said worst ending ever. 0 Stars
Iron Sky: As with Lincoln, fantastic concept but not well executed. 1.5 Stars
Piranha 3DD: Tries to be one of those movies that are so bad they are good but fails miserably. 0.5 Stars
Cabin in the Woods: Unique take on the traditional horror movie format. 4 Stars
Awards
Now, lets dish out some awards. There are you standard ones but I will see if I can come up with some unique ones
Best Movie: The Dark Knight Rises
Worst Movie: The Devil Inside
Best Male Performance: Mark Whalberg and Seth MacFarlane in Ted
Worst Male Performance: The Hoff in Piranha 3DD
Best Female Performance: Rooney Mara in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
Worst Female Performance: Kristen Stewart in Snow White and the Huntsman
Best Director: Joss Wheedon for The Avengers
Surprise: 21 Jump Street
Disappointment: The Watch
OMG Marry Me Now: Emma Stone in The Amazing Spiderman
This is Fucking Awesome: The anticipation for the Merman in Cabin in the Woods
And Now Make-Out: Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel in Total Recall
Brown Pants Time: The ending to Paranormal Activity 4
Oh He is Actually Funny: Channing Tatem in 21 Jump Street
I'd Consider Switching Teams: Chris Hemsworth in Cabin in the Woods, The Avengers and Red Dawn
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